I’m not as think as you drunk I am!

I was compelled to write about my 1st and last love, after I heard of something highly stupid that this friend did under the influence! My first reaction was to crack up completely but now I feel sorry coz he called me for some consolation and all he got was his friend mocking him! It jus took me 30 seconds to realise that he’s not alone and that I have done, if not crazier then at least equally stupid things when buzzed.

I still remember back in college on a friend’s birthday, we went to this place which served cheap alcohol. My other friend who was really frustrated with her love life decided to take it fast this time. Well as expected she got drunk before we hit the 3rd drink. My poor drunk friend wanted to keep drinking while all of us wanted to leave because of her rowdy behaviour. She took it upon herself to abuse the crap out of anyone who so much so as looked in our direction (Well can’t blame them!). All of us were not only extremely embarrassed but very eager to get out of there, so we asked for the bill. In the chaos that was created while trying to pull her out of her chair 2 people paid the bill! Ya we left twice the money! Only to realise it much later! Finally we were out of the place and waiting for the cars to arrive, each second seemed like an hour and our impatient and drunk friend decided to throw a tantrum. Remember when we were 5 yrs old and we would roll on the floor if we dint get what we wanted…well that’s exactly what happened next! She rolled on the floor and screamed that she wanted another drink! Thankfully after much drama the car arrived and she was quickly put in the car; driven home and put to sleep…well of course she never heard the end of it!

You think that was stupid behaviour wait till you read about the crazy things I’ve done when I got drunk! But before that, coming back to another episode: when we got invited to a friend’s boyfriend’s party (now Ex-boyfriend). Another good friend of mine got pissed drunk! She not only threw up on herself but also threw up in another friend’s bag, on her skirt and shoes. Then she was taken to the washroom (to be washed!). She insisted that she was Okie and that she’ll be out in 2 minutes…ya right! It took her 2 hours to come out coz she passed out on the bathroom floor! And I hade to drive her car (while I was still learning how to drive + I was at the party too! so clearly buzzing!) and drop her home! Thank God we’re still alive!

Now the time has come when I write about the person who inspired me to write this- he’s my Studddd Muffin! Well he is undoubtedly the ‘KING OF COMEDY’. I know it’s not funny for him right now but dost when u read this 3 months later trust me u’ll roll on the floor like the rest of us! Well he got drunk like most of us have on more occasions than one, but here are some fundamental mistakes that stud muffin made for this special mention –
He got high at an office party (ok that’s not bad that’s happened to the best of us).
He decided to hit on the VP’s daughter! (maybe she was hot and you couldn’t resist)
The VP’s daughter studies in class 12th! (Kids really do develop early now-a-days!)
Held the VP’s wife’s hand and whispered in her ear – “Message me!” (I really admire your courage!)

No wonder that they say that birds of feather flock together! Under the influence ppl I know have danced on the roads, stripped, picked fights, dumped they partners or gotten dumped!
So I guess it’s only fair for me to write about all the madness I have been upto under the influence. Not only have I thrown a tantrum but I have done that in front of my entire family at a family function! I have locked myself in a public loo and my friends have had to trace the maintenance guys to get me outta there as I was too daft to figure out how to unlock the door! Not only have I ruined people’s parties but have ended my own even before they could take off! Have scared the crap out of a few of my boyfriend’s by telling them that I’m madly in love with them and that I will kill them if they ever leave me!!! Ya right they were outta of there before I could finish the sentence…and I don’t blame them! PEACE! But Mr. Muffin never- ever hit on the VP’s daughter who is in class 12!! And so the award for THE MOST STUPID BEHAVIOUR UNDER THE INFLUENCE GOES TO…. (DRUM ROLL) STUD MUFFIN- for the bravery that he displayed while he whispered in the VP’s wife’s ear!

Not to worry guys…this award could be yours if u have the Guts of Steel and stupidity that could trump his!